Eating my way through Hong Kong

One of the first things I noticed in Hong Kong was the way older Chinese women cut in front of people in line (me in particular). This could be anywhere, the subway, ATM, a restaurant. Its as if they're saying, “yea yea, I've been around long enough, I'll do whatever the hell I want.” OK, I get it, you're old and apparently in this country you've earned the right to demand service first. But does that really entitle you to cough on me on the bus without covering your mouth and belch at the dinner table too?

My friends in New York know about my weakness for soup dumplings. The first time I tried them at M's Shanghai Bistro and Den on Grand Street in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, I was hooked. Being my first time in China, I immediately begin asking around to see where I can find the best ones. Despite the fact that these are more of a Shanghai dish, my friend Jonathan in HK recommended that I try Crystal Jade, in the basement of Times Square, the biggest and sparkliest mall in town. I went, I waited, and I devoured. Seated at a table with three strangers, I ordered the Shanghai dumplings, tofu skin rolls, and steamed pork buns. Everything with pork here was amazing, so much so that I ordered a second round of everything including some sautéed string beans with minced pork – YUM! The gorgeous and slightly older Maggie Chung look-a-like sitting across from me, in her BIG sunglasses and chic suit, seemed mildly horrified by my gluttony, but that didn't stop me from ordering more. Every time the staff came by, they re-arranged the items on the table. Several times, a waiter would just move things around, even if he wasn't delivering new dishes. Moments later, another waiter would move my teacup, then slide my plate forward, just because. This happened in every restaurant I frequented in Hong Kong and it somehow it made me feel well taken care of, so I tipped well, which Hong Kongers never do. Thats probably why they make the fuss, but I prefer to think the waitstaff are just perpetually organizing.

After all this splurging on carbs and pork, I had to hit the gym. My home in HK, the Cosmo Hotel, had a small gym in what used to be a suite. Couple of treadmills, a chest press, lat pull, and some free weights - all immaculate and brand new looking, as if they had never been used and I was the only one around. After the first two sets, I was quite tired and just laid down on the plushly carpeted floor for a moment to catch my breath. I noticed a security camera mounted in top corner of the room, and at that moment I thought, I'll bet someone's watching and thinking I'm passed out or something and worried that they might have some injured foreigner on their hands to deal with and this could mean bad press for the Republic. Sure enough, a security guard walks into the room 20 seconds later and asks if I'm alright. Sure, I'm fine, just resting here, nothing to see.

For my last day in Hong Kong, I decided to head up to Victoria Peak - this huge mountain that towers above all the skyscrapers in the city. The whole experience was rather touristy, but I did it anyway. The 2,500 foot climb hits 15 degrees at some spots, and really made my stomach wince. Once at the top, the crowd is directed from the station through the first of 500 gift shops, and then we climb at least 8 or 9 levels of escalators where we must circle through a level of shops on each floor. The designers here seem to have learned a lot from Disney about tourist retail, because the crowd was loving all this useless junk. There's even a Madame Tussuad's wax museum on the way up to the roof, complete with a young wax Bruce Lee in spandex, yikes! The view from the top is spectacular, like no urban view I've seen. Its also freezing cold and so windy I feel like I might fall off. Back down the mountain for tea now. Off to Saigon next!